


let our future turn to gold

by parametre



Series: so i can crumble at your side [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medical, BoKuroo shenanigans, Depression, Fluff, Future Fic, Love Confessions, M/M, Sick Fic, obligatory star wars references, this is completely self-indulgent
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-03
Updated: 2017-07-11
Packaged: 2018-06-06 04:48:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6738751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parametre/pseuds/parametre
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>snippets from my oikage au</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. the one where everyone finds out

**Author's Note:**

> title from "days" by greg holden

“If I kill him, do you think he would haunt us?” 

 

Tobio sets down his chart and follows Tooru’s gaze to where Ishikawa is animatedly recounting his last surgery to a rather disinterested-looking intern. “Probably,” he says mildly, “Also I don’t think orange would be a good colour on you.” 

 

Tooru gasps, and Tobio fights to keep the smile off his face when the older man turns to him with an affronted expression. “Every colour looks good on me, Tobio-chan!” He lowers his voice, shooting a dark look at Ishikawa, “Anyway, I wouldn’t be stupid enough to get _caught_.” 

 

“It’s a little early in the day for homicide, don’t you think?” Tobio reaches over and discreetly laces their hands together. Tooru only looks mildly placated. “Is this about what Manami-san said yesterday?” 

 

“ _No_ ,” is his immediate reply.

 

“Tooru-san.” 

 

Tooru meets his gaze squarely and stays silent, but Tobio’s stubbornness earned him his title in middle school, so he wins out. 

 

“Fine,” Tooru blusters, pulling his hand away to gesture vehemently at Ishikawa, “I just can’t believe you went on a date with him!” 

 

Tobio resists the urge to roll his eyes. 

 

“It wasn’t a date.” 

 

“The two of you went to dinner,” Tooru argues.  

 

“Yes,” he says slowly, “along with the five other paeds doctors not on-call that night. It was my welcoming party.” 

 

“Well,” Tooru replies, looking suitably chastened, “he still doesn’t need to flirt with you so much.”

 

As if on cue, Ishikawa slots himself between them. 

 

“Good morning, Oikawa-san! Do you mind if I steal Kageyama-sensei for a moment?” 

 

The withering glare Tooru shoots him in reply gives Tobio flashbacks to school. Ishikawa, though, ignores him, and blithely continues on. “Kageyama-sensei, the way you dealt with Asami-chan earlier was great.” 

 

“Ah, thank you,” Tobio replies, smiling politely. 

 

“Really though, Kageyama-sensei, you’re so good with the patients. And with the surgeries too,” Ishikawa says, and then, leaning in, “I wonder what else you’re good at.” 

 

There’s no mistaking the innuendo this time. 

 

There’s also no mistaking the murderous aura radiating from Tooru. 

 

“Ishikawa-sensei,” Tobio says quickly, before Tooru makes good on his first statement, “I’m flattered, but I’m already seeing someone.” 

 

“Oh, who?” Ishikawa is blissfully unaware, it’s almost impressive. “I’m sure I could convince you otherwise.”

 

“ _Me_ ,” Tooru replies loudly, “He’s seeing _me_.” He grabs Tobio’s hand, and Tobio can’t help but blush, because everyone is staring at them now. He sees Nakahara-sensei pass Manami five-thousand yen. “So there won’t be any _convincing_ going on!” 

 

And then Tooru drags them out of the Paeds ward, leaving Ishikawa gaping at the nurse’s station. 

 

It’s the last time anyone at the hospital flirts with Tobio. 

 

(Until Yamada, that is.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i still have a dissertation to finish. this was just more fun.


	2. villager b

_hey got pulled into a surgery, be there in half an hour_

 

_you just took a life_

 

_THE LFIE OF THE PARTY_

 

_bokuto-san, please give shouyou his phone back_

 

_:(_

 

** 

 

When Tobio finally reaches the karaoke bar they’ve rented out for the evening, he’s greeted by Bokuto and Kuroo blasting out ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’. 

 

He promptly decides he’s too sober for this. 

 

“A best man who’s late to the bachelor party? How typical of you, King,” comes a familiar drawl. Tobio turns to find Tsukishima offering him a beer, eyes dark with amusement. He accepts with a small laugh, and tips the bottle towards the front of the room. 

 

“How long has this been going on?” 

 

“Too long,” Tsukishima grumbles, “but it was the only way to make them stop asking for strippers.” 

 

Tobio almost chokes on his mouthful of beer, elbowing Tsukishima and muttering, “asshole,” before collecting himself enough to continue. “Shouyou wouldn’t know what to do with himself.” 

 

“That’s what I said,” Tsukishima agrees. 

 

They chat for a few more minutes until Shouyou realises he’s arrived, and then Tobio spends half an hour trying to convince the other man that they really, _really_ don’t need to sing a duet together to prove their friendship. 

 

“Oh man,” Shouyou sighs happily, leaning into him. In the background, Utada Hikaru is playing but no one is singing along, too caught up in a debate over who the cutest member of Perfume is. “I’m getting married next week.” 

 

Tobio laughs, “A dumbass like you, who would have thought.” 

 

“Hey!” Shouyou stumbles a little as he punches Tobio in the arm. “You’re such a dick.”

 

Tobio’s about to reply when his phone buzzes in his pocket. He pulls it out, steadying Shouyou against his side and balancing his beer against the shorter man’s shoulder. 

 

_do we have a fire extinguisher_

 

He stares for a moment. 

 

_what_

 

_nvm i found it_

 

This is the man he’s in love with, he thinks to himself a little helplessly. 

 

_please don’t burn the building down tooru-san_

 

“Things are going well with the Grand King then, huh?” Shouyou says, looking pleased. Tobio smiles shyly, then nods, because it’s not like Shouyou didn’t already know. “Goooood.” He sways a little, and some of Tobio’s beer spills onto his t-shirt, but he continues, “I’m glad you found your Villager B, Tobio. Though, don’t forget, I helped!” 

 

“–My what?” 

 

“Your Vil’ger B,” Shouyou slurs, a little indignantly. Tobio has no idea what he’s talking about, and says as much. “Y’know. Your _Hitoka_. ‘xcept she’s not my Villager B.” He hiccups. “She’s so much _more_. And she agreed to marry _me_.” He smiles dreamily, “I’m so lucky.” 

 

“Hey, hey, hey, hey!” Bokuto runs up to them and throws his arms around them both. Tobio stumbles a little under the added weight, a little unsteady on his fourth beer of the night. “When are the strippers arriving?” 

 

Shouyou’s eyes go comically wide. “Strippers!?” he squeaks. 

 

“No,” Tobio says firmly, “there will be no strippers.” 

 

“Whaaat?” Bokuto whines, and then Kuroo joins in. 

 

“It’s not a bachelor party without strippers,” he says gravely. Tobio looks around for Akaashi and Kenma, and spots them in the corner with Lev and Yamaguchi. _Shit_. “Y’know, Hinata, Yachi’s probably got strippers.” 

 

Shouyou looks aghast. 

 

Tobio sighs. 

 

“ _Wait_ ,” Bokuto says suddenly, turning to Kuroo, “bro, I’ve got the best idea.” 

 

“Bro, I love it already,” Kuroo replies. Tobio desperately looks towards Akaashi and Kenma, trying to silently summon them over. Unsurprisingly, it doesn’t work. 

 

“ _We_ should be the strippers!” 

 

Between them, Shouyou giggles, “no, Bokuto-san!” 

 

“Yes, bro!” Kuroo yells at the same time, already moving to take his t-shirt off. As if summoned by some invisible force, Tanaka and Yamamoto come over, whipping off their t-shirts with exaggerated war cries. 

 

Tobio glances at his watch. _9:42_ , it reads. He catches Tsukishima’s eye through the chaos and they share a commiserating look. Tsukishima holds up his drink, and Tobio does the same.

 

_Well, if you can’t beat them_ , he thinks, downing the rest of his beer and grabbing another _._

 

**

 

It’s nearly 4am when Tobio gets home. Maru wakes him up at the sound of the taxi pulling up outside, so Tooru’s there to let him in, and the startled look on Tobio’s face as he opens the door is stupidly endearing. 

 

“Tooru-san, did I wake you up?” Tobio stumbles as he takes his shoes off, but Tooru’s quick to steady him. 

 

“No, it’s fine,” he says warmly, “did you have a good time?” 

 

Tobio nods, and then abruptly falls to his knees. “Hi, Maru!” he says happily, hugging their dog to his chest. Tooru stares at the picture they make for a moment, before laughing and pulling the younger man back to his feet. 

 

“Let’s get you to bed,” he murmurs, pressing a quick kiss to his hair. 

 

“Mm’kay,” Tobio replies easily, following him. He collapses on their bed as soon as they enter the bedroom, and Tooru has to struggle to take his clothes off, eventually settling on leaving him in just his boxers. 

 

“Drink some water,” he says, holding out a glass. Tobio drinks it obediently, and then lets Tooru tuck him into their bed. “I’ll be right back.” 

 

He heads to the kitchen to refill the glass, and grabs some aspirin too. He sets it down next to Tobio’s side of the bed, before finally joining the younger man. 

 

“I’m gon’ be so hungover tomorrow,” Tobio groans, shifting to face him. Tooru laughs quietly and runs his hand through the other man’s hair. 

 

“Yeah,” he agrees, pulling Tobio close. “I’ll take care of you, though.” He feels a swell of affection at Tobio’s answering sleepy smile. 

 

“‘m so glad you’re my Vi’lger B,” Tobio mumbles, curling into Tooru’s side. His breathing evens out in the next few moments as he drops off to sleep. Tooru stares at the ceiling. 

 

“…your what?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kudos to the office for the 'life of the party' joke. 
> 
> i wrote this in an hour, this au is like the gift that keeps on giving for my muse.


	3. tripping eyes and flooded lungs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> set six months into their relationship (fluff. all of the fluff.)

“Tooru-san, you have a temperature of 39°C. That means you’re sick.” 

 

“No, I’m not,” Tooru insists, face flushed and eyes fever-bright. “I’m fine.” 

 

Tobio sighs and kneels down next to the bed. He runs a hand through Tooru’s hair, and the older man gives a soft sigh at the contact. “You need to rest,” Tobio says quietly. “Doctor’s orders.” That draws a small smile out of Tooru. 

 

“But it’s date night,” Tooru rasps, looking upset, “I don’t want to miss date night.” 

 

Tobio stills, surprised by the force of Tooru’s feelings for him for what feels like the thousandth time in the six months that they’ve been dating. 

 

“There’ll be other date nights,” he says finally, with a swell of affection for the other man. Tooru only looks mildly appeased. The chaste kiss he presses to Tooru’s forehead seems to help somewhat. 

 

The quiet of Tooru’s apartment settles over them: Tooru, lying in bed in his ratty alien pyjamas, and Tobio kneeling on the floor next to him, gently stroking his head. Tooru’s eyes start to drift closed, and he blearily reaches for Tobio’s free hand. 

 

“Don’t go,” he mumbles. 

 

Tobio squeezes his hand. “Don’t worry,” he says softly, “I’m not going anywhere.”  

 

** 

 

Tooru wakes up a few hours later, feeling marginally better. Tobio is next to him, on the bed this time, reading on his iPad, and Tooru shifts until his head is nestled in the other man’s lap. Tobio drapes one of his arms around him, curling a hand into his hair, and Tooru sighs happily, arching into the touch. 

 

“Feeling a little better?” Tobio asks, voice pitched low. “I think your fever’s gone down a bit.” 

 

“Yeah,” he murmurs, “thirsty though.” 

 

“Here, have some water,” Tobio replies, helping him sit up and offering him a glass along with some people. “I made some okayu while you were asleep too, if you think you can eat,” he continues, as Tooru drinks. 

 

“Mmm,” Tooru nods, handing the glass back and settling back into Tobio’s side. “Maybe a little later.” 

 

“Sure,” Tobio replies easily. He picks up his iPad and wraps an arm around Tooru again. “Want to watch a movie?” 

 

“Something with aliens,” Tooru says, although his eyes are already starting to close again. 

 

Tobio chuckles, “no surprise there. How about Star Wars?” 

 

Tooru nods, “But–“

 

“–not the prequels,” Tobio finishes, smoothly, and Tooru laughs, despite himself. 

 

“Yeah,” he murmurs, as sleep slowly pulls him under, “there’s hope for you yet.” 

 

** 

 

When he wakes up again, it’s light outside. 

 

His head feels clear again, only a stuffy nose and general soreness leftover from the day before. Next to him, Tobio is asleep, lashes dark against his cheeks and breaths whisper quiet. Tooru studies the peaceful expression on the younger man’s face for a long while, before finally getting up to go to the bathroom. 

 

When he looks at himself in the mirror as he’s washing his hands, he almost doesn’t recognise himself. His hair is a mess, and his fevered flush has been replaced with an unhealthy pallor. He suddenly registers that he’s wearing the alien pyjamas that his mother had bought him when he was fifteen, years of wear and tear obvious in the faded colours and stretched out seams. He groans quietly, cheeks heating with embarrassment. 

 

Tobio’s still asleep when Tooru pads back into the bedroom, reflexively curling into him as Tooru gets back into bed. It doesn’t escape Tooru’s notice that this is probably the first time he’s let a partner see him in this state. 

 

Well, he thinks a little helplessly, none of the others had been Tobio. 

 

The rhythm of Tobio’s breathing changes a few minutes later, and Tooru watches as his eyes flutter open. He blinks and then breaks into a sleepy smile. 

 

“Tooru-san,” he says sweetly, “how are you feeling?” 

 

Tooru thinks of the spare key he had made the week before, and of the feeling that swells in his chest as he smiles back at Tobio. 

 

“Great,” he replies, reaching for Tobio’s hand, “I’m just great.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from "northern downpour" by panic! at the disco. 
> 
> my macbook broke the day before my dissertation was due (yay) and i got it back this week! exams are going to be the end of me, but writing this made me feel better. :)


	4. you don't have to smile so sad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tooru's Very Bad Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: depression (it's not explicitly stated, but i used my own experiences) 
> 
> chapter title from "tell me if you wanna go home" from the begin again soundtrack

Tooru is having a Bad Day. 

 

It’s his first Bad Day in a long time – probably since he started dating Tobio– so it’s disconcerting to wake up to the all too familiar feeling of impending doom. He stares at the ceiling for a few moments, frowning and willing himself to move, but his limbs feel heavy and foreign, and the air is stifling, and everything feels wrong, wrong, _wrong_. 

 

His alarm goes off for a second time, and he blindly reaches with his hand until the blaring stops. 

 

The sun is streaming into his room through a crack in the curtains, and Tooru sits up and follows the movements of the dust motes in the air. Everything feels strange and far away, and he already wants to lie back down and curl up in bed. 

 

Instead, he pastes a smile onto his face and rolls out of bed to start getting ready for work. 

 

 _Fake it till you make it_ , he thinks to himself. 

 

** 

 

His morning is a disaster. 

 

An intern bumps into him in the hallway and spills her coffee all over his shirt, so he has to change into scrubs, except his are all in the laundry so he has to wear one of the spare sets which is way too big for him. So, now he looks as unattractive as he feels, and he almost cries when he first catches sight of his reflection. 

 

There’s an administrative mix up, and somehow his whole morning is double booked, which means he has to call in a favour from Kishitani-sensei, the other physical therapist, and even then his appointments run late. The father of one of his patients loses his temper while waiting, so Tooru has to sit through a five minute tirade against the healthcare system, with a migraine building behind his temples all the while. Kishitani-sensei makes snide comments throughout the morning about Tooru’s inability to organise his work, and Tooru has to bite his tongue because Kishitani is five years his senior and more than capable of making his life very, very difficult. 

 

Tooru finally ends up going to cafeteria for lunch at around two o’clock, and when the lunch lady tells him that they’re sold out of milk bread, Tooru can only think, _of course_. He buys some melon bread instead, except it’s all wrong, because he _hates_ melon bread. 

 

The cafeteria is almost empty, the last dregs of the lunch rush starting to file out, so he picks a small table by the window. He sits down with a sigh, ready to wallow his way through lunch, but is promptly startled when someone settles in the seat opposite him. 

 

“Wha-“ he begins, looking up, only to find Tobio offering him a small smile and an unopened packet of milk bread. “Tobio-chan.” 

 

“I thought you might need a pick me up after the morning you’ve had,” Tobio says, pushing the milk bread into his hand. 

 

“Oh,” Tooru says a little dumbly, staring at the milk bread. Tobio’s knees brush against his under the table, and for a moment, Tooru feels a spark of warmth, though it’s quickly doused by his sheer exhaustion. 

 

“How are you doing?” Tobio asks, sympathetically. 

 

“Ok,” Tooru lies. 

 

Tobio’s lips quirk down. “You can be honest. I know what it’s like to have a tough day.” 

 

All of a sudden, Tooru is filled with an irrational anger. “What would you know, Tobio? Everything comes easily for you after all, King,” he snaps. 

 

He regrets the words as soon as he says them, but it’s too late: Tobio physically recoils from him, and his expression turns shuttered. 

 

“Right,” Tobio says frostily, “sorry I asked.” He stands. “Excuse me, I have a surgery to prep for.” 

 

He’s out of the door before Tooru can even begin to formulate an apology. 

 

“Fuck,” Tooru mumbles miserably. 

 

** 

 

Tooru’s afternoon is a lot less busy than his morning, but his argument with Tobio leaves him feeling even worse. Today’s one of those days where their schedules barely overlap, so he doesn’t see the younger man at all. He drops by the paeds ward during a break, but Manami tells him that Tobio is still in surgery. 

 

“Fix it,” she tells him sternly as she sees him off. 

 

** 

 

He inevitably ends up calling Hajime.

 

“You’re an idiot,” Hajime tells him once he’s finished, and it’s like a damn breaks, and suddenly, Tooru’s crying. Distantly, he’s glad it’s the end of the day and he’s alone in his office, because he’d hate for anyone to see him like this. 

 

“What do I do?” he sobs, “I didn’t mean it, I really didn’t mean it.” 

 

Hajime sighs, and lets him cry for a bit before speaking again, “Tooru, you fucked up.” When Tooru starts sobbing harder, he sighs again. “But. _But_ – and god knows why– Kageyama cares about you. He cares a lot. You need to speak to him. Apologise for being an asshole.”

 

“I don’t know _how_ ,” Tooru wails. 

 

“I can’t help you,” Hajime says patiently, “this is your relationship.” 

 

Tooru sniffs, and roughly scrubs his hand across his face. “I know. I _know_.” The front of his borrowed scrubs is damp with tears. “I can’t lose him. I love him.”

 

It’s the first time Tooru’s said it out loud. 

 

Hajime is silent for awhile. 

 

“Does he know that?” 

 

** 

 

Ten minutes later, Tooru feels a little less hopeless. He tries to clean himself up with some semblance of success, and the only signs of his conversation with Hajime are his slightly swollen eyes. Taking a deep breath, he decides to go find Tobio. 

 

A glance at his clock tells him the younger man should have finished rounds by now, so he gathers his things, and opens his door to find Tobio sitting outside his office, looking a little shellshocked. 

 

“Tobio!” 

 

“Tooru-san,” Tobio breathes, gazing up at him with wide eyes. 

 

“How long have you been sitting here?” Tooru squeaks. 

 

“I, um, decided to come find you after rounds,” Tobio mumbles, flushing bright red. 

 

There’s a tuft of hair sticking out of his scalp, and Tooru’s hands itch to smooth it back down. 

 

“How long have you been here?” Tooru asks faintly. 

 

“Long enough.” 

 

“Oh,” Tooru replies, feeling a flush of his own work its way onto his face. “I–“

 

“–did you mean it?” Tobio rushes out. His gaze is intense, and for a moment, Tooru is transported back to middle school. 

 

“Yes,” Tooru replies quietly, “I did.” 

 

“Me too,” Tobio says, standing suddenly. His hands are bunched in his lab coat, a nervous tic of his, and Tooru reaches out to take his hands on reflex. As his fingers curl around Tobio’s, he feels everything shift into normalcy, the last vestiges of wrongness dispelled by the warmth of Tobio’s touch. 

 

“Yeah?” Tooru says. 

 

Tobio nods, face crumpling, and Tooru releases one of his hands to stroke his tears away. 

 

“I love you,” he says solemnly, and Tobio half-laughs, half-sobs. 

 

“Me too,” he replies, “Me too, Tooru-san, I love you too.”

 

**

 

Turns out, Tooru’s Bad Day wasn’t a very bad day at all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i've been on holiday all summer, which is why i haven't been able to post for so long, but this was running around in my head. un-betaed, so please let me know if you spot any mistakes! 
> 
> as always, your comments/kudos keep me going :)


	5. the sibling talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which natsu meets oikawa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more self-indulgent writing

The youngest Hinata has spent the last fifteen minutes glaring at Tooru. 

 

_You’re losing your touch_ , says a voice in his head that sounds suspiciously like Iwa-chan’s. 

 

He inches closer to Tobio, who is deep in conversation with Glasses-kun, and the younger man absently squeezes his hand. The casual intimacy still gives him a little thrill; Tooru had dismissed a stable relationship as a pipe dream after a string of partners had dumped him in high school and college for “not caring enough”. 

 

That’s definitely not a problem here, he thinks wryly to himself as he studies his boyfriend. It’s hard to believe he had ever thought of Tobio as arrogant and unfriendly: the younger man is quietly unreserved and affectionate, especially around his friends and loved ones. It’s a stark contrast to the sullen angry boy Tooru had been confronted with in his third year of high school, though thinking back to Tobio in middle school, Tooru wonders exactly how much of his perception of Tobio had been a misunderstanding. 

 

“Is everything alright?” Tobio asks, drawing him out of his thoughts. 

 

Tooru smiles embarrassedly and discreetly gestures at Natsu across the room. “I, uh, don’t think someone likes me very much.” 

 

Tobio frowns, confused. “That’s odd. Natsu’s usually even friendlier than Shouyou.” 

 

“Natsu’s not usually confronted by her biggest rival,” cuts in Glasses-kun, smirking. Tobio looks even more confused, while Tooru is finally beginning to get an inkling of why the youngest Hinata seems to absolutely detest him. “Oikawa-san, Natsu is _very_ fond of Tobio here.” 

 

Tobio laughs bashfully, “I _am_ like her second brother, I guess.” 

 

Glasses-kun snorts. 

 

“I think she might like you a bit more than that,” Tooru says faintly. Tobio still looks clueless, so Tooru just smiles and shakes his head. “It’s fine. What were you talking about?” 

 

 

** 

 

Later, when he’s on his way back from the restroom, he bumps into Natsu in the hallway. They’re just outside the private room Hinata and Yachi rented for their engagement dinner, but the sharp gaze Natsu fixes on him makes Tooru feel as if they’re the only two people in the entire world. 

 

“Natsu-chan, is everything alright?” he asks weakly. 

 

Her eyes narrow. 

 

“Look,” she says, and now she looks just like her older brother when he’s on the court, focussed and dangerous, “let me just make one thing clear: I don’t like you. The sooner you leave Tobio-nii alone, the better.” Tooru gapes, uselessly. “But also, if you ever hurt Tobio-nii, I will make your life _miserable_.” 

 

“…Right,” Tooru manages. 

 

“Good,” she replies. “Excuse me.” 

 

And with that, she’s gone. 

 

“Who knew? The Grand King is scared of teenage girls,” says a voice behind him. Tooru spins around to find Glasses-kun – _Tsukishima_ – smirking at him. The blond-haired man relaxes into a smile, and suddenly, Tooru can see that Tobio’s not the only one who’s changed since high school. “I don’t blame you. When I first started dating Tadashi, she told me she would break my headphones if I ever made him cry again. She was _eight_.” 

 

Tooru laughs. 

 

“Come on, let’s head back inside before they notice we’ve been gone for too long,” Tsukishima says, “Shouyou would be insufferable if he ever found out we were scared of his little sister.” 

 

“You know, I have a nephew who would probably get along great with her,” Tooru says, as he follows Tsukishima in. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you guys, i just wanted more natsu in this verse. she's the cutest.


	6. when you grow up, what kind of boy will you be?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yonezawa megumi's night in the paeds ward

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my first update in almost a year -- i'm so sorry! i started working and it's been so busy. :( 
> 
> i...don't really know what this is, but i'm trying to bounce ideas around. i should be updating this more often!
> 
> (chapter title from "when you grow up" - priscilla ahn)

Megumi is in the paeds ward, waiting for Yotarou to come out of surgery and mentally listing all the ways the situation could be worse, the she sees him. 

 

Of course, the first time she sees Oikawa Tooru in the nine years since they broke up, and it’s when her son is having an emergency appendectomy, and she both looks and feels a mess. She curses herself for tempting fate, then her husband for being away for work, and finally Oikawa for still looking so good. 

 

He doesn’t see her immediately, and she takes the chance to study him. He clearly works at the hospital, judging by the scrubs he’s wearing and his familiarity with the nurses. That’s somewhat surprising, given how obsessed with volleyball he had been, but she remembers hearing about an accident. She just hadn’t been interested in hearing anything further, not after how they had broken up. 

 

_“Oikawa-senpai, sometimes I feel like you’re so focused on volleyball that you don’t even notice me.”_

 

She can pinpoint the moment he recognises her: his eyes widen and his posture stiffens slightly. She waits for him to slip on that awful mask he would use around people he was uncomfortable with, but she’s surprised when, instead, he takes a deep breath and just – softens. 

 

“Tachibana-chan,” he says, walking over and taking a seat next to her, “what brings you here?” 

 

“It’s Yonezawa now,” she replies, holding her left hand up with a wry smile. Her wedding band glints in the dim light of the ward: Hideaki, misinformed as always, had spent three years’ salary on it, and the memory still makes her laugh. “My son, Yotarou, collapsed earlier. They said it was acute appendicitis. He’s in surgery now, so I’m just waiting.” 

 

To her horror, she finds her eyes stinging by the end of her sentence. 

 

“I’m so sorry,” Oikawa says, “everything will be okay, Yonezawa-san.” He reaches over to briefly squeeze her shoulder, and, for a moment, Megumi is seventeen again.

 

_“Oh my god. I can’t believe he said yes.”_

 

_Megumi just makes a dying noise and keeps her face covered with her hands._

 

_“Megumi,” Nino squeals, “you’re going out with Oikawa-senpai!”_

 

_Megumi’s face is still burning. She can still feel the heat of Oikawa-senpai’s hand on her shoulder. “Nino-chan. Am I dreaming? This feels like a dream.”_

 

She takes a deep breath. 

 

“Thanks.” She sits back in her chair, and looks over at him. “What about you, senpai? What brings you here?” 

 

Oikawa chuckles and runs a hand through his hair. “Wow,” he says, “I haven’t been called that in a long time.” He gestures to the cup of coffee he has sitting by his feet. “I’m just dropping this off.”

 

“Is that so? That’s nice of you.” 

 

He laughs, flushing slightly. “Ah, my intentions aren’t that pure-hearted. The coffee’s for my partner, they’re on the night shift tonight.” 

 

“Oh?” Megumi knows her surprise must be showing on her face, but she can’t help it. It’s difficult to imagine the boy who forgot her birthday, who would skip out on dates for volleyball practice, and who once accidentally gave her chocolate with almonds in it when she was allergic, turning into _this_. “That’s surprisingly sweet of you.” 

 

He begins to reply, but before he can, the doors to the operating rooms open. The doctor from earlier, Kageyama-sensei, emerges, and Megumi is on her feet immediately. She vaguely registers Oikawa getting to his feet next to her as well, but her attention is solely on the dark haired doctor with the teddy bear scrub cap Yotarou had been so enamoured with.

 

“Sensei, how is he?” 

 

Kageyama-sensei seems momentarily surprised by something, but he composes himself quickly. “The surgery went smoothly, Yonezawa-san. Yotarou-kun is just in post-op right now, but he’ll be through shortly and you’ll be able to see for yourself.” 

 

Megumi collapses back into her seat, and both Oikawa and Kageyama-sensei rush over to her. “Oh, thank god,” she whispers. “Thank you, sensei.” 

 

Kageyama-sensei nods, “of course. I’ll be monitoring him for the rest of the night, but I don’t expect any problems. Please let me know if you need anything at all, ok?” 

 

“I will,” she replies, suddenly tired. “Thank you, again.” 

 

“You should get some rest,” Oikawa says gently. “The nurses will wake you when Yotarou-kun gets back.” 

 

“I–yes, I think I will do that.” She smiles weakly at him. “It was nice to see you after all this years.” 

 

“Take care of yourself, Yonezawa-san.” 

 

“You too, senpai.” 

 

It’s strange how things have changed, she thinks, as she walks back to the room they’ve placed Yotarou in. Looking back now, Megumi can recognise that she played a part in their breaking up too. She had idolised Oikawa too much too ever have a real relationship with him, and he had always made it clear that his priority was volleyball. But, she thinks, as she unpacks Yotarou’s overnight bag, a small part of her had always thought she could change that. Part of the allure of a relationship with Oikawa had been earning even a fraction of his attention — be it over other girls, or over volleyball. 

 

She thinks of Oikawa tonight, waiting for his partner with the cup of coffee, and the softness in his eyes as he discussed them and wonders what sort of person they must be to earn not just a fraction of his attention but the sum of it.

 

She should call her husband, she thinks. 

 

“Oh,” she murmurs, realising she left her phone back at the waiting area. She wanders back and then stops because– 

 

_Oh._

 

Oikawa and Kageyama-sensei are sitting together. They aren’t doing anything, just chatting, but Kageyama-sensei is drinking the cup of coffee, and Oikawa is watching him with warm eyes, the hint of a smile curving his lips. It’s the most content she’s ever seen him. 

 

“–I’m not saying I don’t trust you with the yakiniku,” Kageyama-sensei is saying, “But I would definitely be more comfortable if you just ordered pizza.” 

 

“Tobio-chan! That’s so mean!” Oikawa is laughing though, and Kageyama-sensei is smiling at him fondly, and Megumi has no doubt that if they were anywhere else, one of them would have leaned over to kiss the other.

 

She coughs lightly, and they both look up. 

 

“Yonezawa-san, is everything ok?” Kageyama-sensei asks, making to standing up. 

 

She waves him away, and points to her phone. “I wanted to call my husband, and realised I left my phone here. Please, sit.” She picks up her phone and turns to head back to the room. 

 

But, first– “It was nice of Oikawa-senpai to get you coffee while you’re on the night shift, Kageyama-sensei,” she says, grinning, “You must be close.”

 

Oikawa colours, caught. 

 

Megumi just waves cheekily as she heads back. 

 

Oikawa isn’t the only one who’s changed since high school. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unbetaed so please let me know if there are any mistakes!


	7. even though your words hurt the most

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tobio and Tooru have a Fight, and Things Are Said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bet y'all weren't expecting another chapter so soon, huh? well, neither was i. 
> 
> chapter title from "agape" - bear's den

Tooru can’t even remember what started it all. 

 

He can’t remember what started it, but he knows it needs to end. Tobio won’t look at him, and Tooru has a sneaking suspicion it’s because he’s close to tears. The part of him that’s been exchanging verbal barbs with the younger man for the past half an hour feels a vindictive pleasure at this, but the more rational part of him recognises that once he’s calmed down, it will only cause him regret. 

 

He needs to walk away before he causes anymore damage. 

 

“I’m going to get some air,” he announces into the terse space between them.

 

Tobio does look at him then, and there’s a flash of _something_ across his face then – fear? But that can’t be right, Tooru thinks– before he nods. “Ok,” he says. His voice breaks over the two syllables, and Tooru almost hesitates, before he shakes his head and leaves. 

 

He needs some space to think. 

 

** 

 

Hajime answers the door with a resigned air, and gestures for him to come inside. “What have you done now, Shittykawa?” 

 

For once Tooru doesn’t protest the nickname, and this doesn’t escape the other man’s notice. His eyebrows furrow, and he ushers Tooru into the living room, leaving him to make himself comfortable to go to the kitchen to grab two beers. 

 

“So?” he says, offering Tooru a bottle. 

 

Tooru quirks a bitter smile, and stays silent for awhile, picking at the label on the bottle. “Do you and Hana ever fight?” he asks finally.

 

Hajime resists the urge to roll his eyes at the non sequitur. 

 

“Yeah,” he says, “all the time. Mostly it’s little things, like whose turn it is to wash the dishes, or what colour we should paint the baby’s room, but sometimes it’s serious.” 

 

“What do you do then?” 

 

Hajime shrugs. “What any couple does, I guess. We talk. Someone apologises, maybe both of us. Then, we keep going.” He turns to the other man. “Want to tell me what this is all about?” 

 

“I had a fight with Tobio,” Tooru sighs. “It got heated, and I–I said some things I shouldn’t have, I think.” 

 

Hajime smiles wryly. “You were always pretty hotheaded.” 

 

“You don’t understand, Iwa-chan,” Tooru continues, looking upset, “I just– I got so angry, and I just kept saying things I didn’t mean. I would have kept saying them, too. And Tobio’s _face_ at the end–“ He breaks off and buries his face in his hands. 

 

Hajime presses his shoulder against his in silent comfort. 

 

“Relationships are hard,” he says quietly, “they take work, and you’re not always going to get it right. But it’s worth it, because at the end of it all, you get to come home to the person you love more than anyone else in the world.” He nudges Tooru, and waits until the other man looks up at him. “The question is, is Kageyama that person for you?”

 

Tooru frowns. “Of course he is,” he replies immediately, “I don’t want anyone else.” 

 

This time Hajime does roll his eyes. “ _I_ know that,” he replies, “but does Kageyama? Because from where I’m sitting, you’ve just walked out on him after a big fight, and left him all alone.” 

 

Tooru pales. 

 

“I have to go,” he says, standing up, “I’ll text you later.”

 

Hajime follows him out. “Don’t screw this up, Shittykawa.” 

 

“I won’t,” Tooru says, and when he turns around, he’s got the same look he used to have on the court. It’s the look that got them both into trouble when they were six and Tooru insisted he could climb the ash tree in the neighbourhood park. It’s the look Tooru gets when he’s latched onto an idea and refuses to let go, because if he’s anything, he’s a stubborn bastard. 

 

Hajime grins. 

 

“Good luck, Tooru.” 

 

“Thanks, Hajime.” 

 

**

 

Tobio is still in the living room when Tooru gets back. 

 

“Tooru-san–“

 

“Tobio–“ 

 

They both fall silent. 

 

Tobio won’t look at him, keeps his gaze downward instead, so Tooru keeps his distance. 

 

“Tobio?” he says, gently, aching with the need to touch the other man; to offer comfort in some shape or form; but he knows he can’t, not yet. “I’m sorry.” 

 

Tobio looks up, then, and for a moment– just a moment– Tooru hates himself a little: the younger man’s eyes are red-rimmed, and there’s an unhappy downturn to his mouth that Tooru hasn’t seen in a long time. _And you put it there_ , he thinks to himself, grimly. 

 

“Can we talk?” he asks, “Please?” 

 

Tobio nods, hands shaking where they’re curled at the bottom of his sweater. “I think we should.” He takes a soft, shaking breath. “Can I speak first?” 

 

“Oh,” Tooru pauses, bites back the thousands of things he wants to say, “um, yeah. Of course.” 

 

Tobio smiles wanly. 

 

“I know I’m not an easy person to be with,” he says quietly. His eyes are wet and there’s a defeated set to his shoulders. “I love you. I don’t think I’ve ever loved anything as much as I love you, but I-I, um, I would understand if you wanted to leave. And, um. And–” He breaks off, crying freely now. 

 

“Oh, _Tobio_ ,” Tooru breathes, stepping forward and pulling the other man into a hug. Tobio melts into it after a few moments, burying his face in Tooru’s shoulder, and Tooru barely resists crying himself at the sound of the younger man’s quiet sobs. “Being with you is the easiest part. I can’t _leave_. This is – you’re _it_ for me.” 

 

Tobio lifts his head to stare at him with wide eyes. 

 

Tooru smiles helplessly. “I thought you knew,” he says, quietly, gently brushing a stray tear off Tobio’s cheek, “I love you, Tobio, and I plan to spend the rest of my life loving you.” He pauses. “That is, uh, if you’ll let me.” 

 

Tobio’s face crumples again, but before Tooru can start to panic, the younger man is nodding and pulling him into a very messy, very teary kiss. Tooru would tease him for it, but he’s not so dry-eyed anymore either. 

 

Instead, he just wraps arms around the other man and savours the moment. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Iwaizumi as their disgruntled but invested relationship counsellor is my favourite headcanon in this verse. 
> 
> As always, unbetaed so please point out any mistakes!


End file.
